Ed, Edd, Eddy, n Edna
Chapter 3: Mission ED-possible
Note: I do not own Ed, Edd, n Eddy...but "The Fourth Ed" is mine!
This is a spin-off of "The Grim ED-ventures of Ed, Edd, n Eddy". I always wondered what if Edna existed in the "Ed, Edd, n Eddy" canon and...THIS STORY DOES NOT CONTAIN SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS!
Also I reconned that this fanfic takes place in June so that the summer can last longer.
Last Time: Edna meets May Kanker and she is happy to finally make a friend... as well as friends in Ed, Edd n Eddy, but can this last? I mean what if May's sisters find out?
(The Next Morning)
A day passed after May Kanker met Edna, friendship has has altered May to the point of making her polar opposites of her other sisters.
Lee tells Marie, "Something's wrong with May, either she has worms or she is lonely." Marie then says, "I know how we can cheer her up!"
Ed comes out of a shower (Yeah... you heard me!) Edna then says, "There! Now do you feel nice, fresh, and better? I mean if you continue to stink up the house, my parents wouldn't approve of it and also it's time for CHANGE!" Ed then says, "Yeah... just like that guy on TV who keeps talking about change, you are a miracle worker Edna!" Edna then says, "Well looks like I won the bet, Eddy owes me a dollar now that I got you to shower! And with that dollar the jawbreakers are on me! umm Ed? Where are you?"
Edna looks around and finds out Ed has vanished and his clothes are still there. she shouts, "OH MY GOODNESS! ED'S STREAKING...AGAIN!"
Edna then runs out of the house and shows, "ED! ED!" And she ends up in a mudhole. Rolf walks up to her and says, "Hello strange girl, you not be from around here yes no?" Edna then says, "Hi to you too... anyway have you seen this guy running around naked in these parts?" Rolf sees a pic of Ed swallowing a pie in one bite. Rolf responds, "Rolf have not seen pie-faced Ed boy anywhere, who are you?" Edna then gets up and says, "Oh my name is Edna, pleased to meet you!" Rolf then shivers and shouts, "ANOTHER ED! RUN AWAY!" Edna then grabs Rolf by the arm and says, "Hold on, I'm not going to do anything bad, I'm here to look for a friend, anyway if you don't see him, can you at least help me?" Rolf then says, "Well since you seem harmless and friendly, Rolf will help, Rolf must get other Urban Rangers for the rescue mission!"
(Soon... and after Edna showered and changed into a nice dress with images of lemons on it)
Edna then meets Johnny 2x4 and she says, "Hey, Cousin Nazz told me about you, you must be Johnny 2x4, how are you?" Johnny then says, "Wow, you must be new here, what's your name?" Edna then says, "Why, it's Edna!" Johnny then says, "Does that mean... (Edna nods) COOL! FOUR EDS!" Edna replies, "Well one of them is missing and seeing as you boys are the local boy scouts I hope you guys return him safe and sound! Oh hi Jimmy!" Rolf then says, "Rolf brings you here to save no neck Ed boy and Rolf knows one place he can possibly be held at!"
Lee Kanker then goes up to Marie and says, "Hey Marie, some uniformed weirdos are on our yard, better get out the 2x4s!"
Meanwhile, Ed is tied up and tossed into Mays room. Ed closes his eyes and says, "This is just a nightmare, this is just a nightmare. I'm in my happy place, I'm in my happy place, Grandpa, is that you!" May Kanker shows up and as she unties him she says to him, "Hi Ed, why did my sisters throw you in here anyway?" Ed hides under the bed and shivers.
May has a frustraighted look on her face and says, "Ed, remember we had fun together last night?" Ed then says, "This could be a trap set by the Kanker Sisters!" May replies, "But I'm a good guy now!" Ed glares at her and says, "Shut up Jiggler, Im on to you
" May replies, "Ok first off wrong fanfic and second remember, Edna became my friend and helped me make new friends with you guys?"
It took Ed 15 minutes to remember and he shouts, "HUG ME!" May just does that and then she says to Ed, "I know how to make use of this situation, and she reads TV Guide, tells Ed, "I happen to be the only Kanker who is literate." and she turns on the TV, changing the channel to show a episode of "Round the Twist" Ed watches in pure delight and says, "AUSTRALIANS ARE WEIRD!" while May is confused by this and asks, "I wonder why Fox Kids showed this?"
Edna continues to look for Ed but to her horror, she sees Rolf, Jimmy, and Johnny tied up in a ribbon and a tag is attatched to them and it reads "NICE TRY!". Edna then sees Double D walking towards her and he asks her "Have you seen Ed lately Edna?" Edna then replies, "No I haven't and I can guess where he's at... Get Cousin Nazz and Eddy... this is war!"
Eddy hears about this and he says, "I knew it! Those "Skanker Sisters" should never be trusted! Nazz is shocked and says, "You befriended a Kanker? I tell ya cousin, you do such weird things, like did you tell the Eds about the graveyard thing?" Double D asks Edna, "What do you mean by "Graveyard thing?" Edna then says, "Ok... I just like hanging out in graveyards, they are silent, serene, and really fun to be at on Halloween."
Eddy then says, "Ok, you are one Spooky chick! Anyway we need a plan to get Lumpy back and plan revenge on all three of them!" Edna then stands up and tells Eddy, "Eddy! Don't blame May, I'm sure the other two planned this! I mean she really does want friends but her anti-social bretheren seem to think otherwise. So we're going to get Ed back and plan a way for May to hang with us and that is that!"
Eddy then asks, "What is up with you Edna?" Edna then tells Eddy as well as everyone, "My older sister told me to always help those in need and we both believe in peace and serenity. I hate bullying and I like helping others and friendship. Double D and Nazz are in tears at Edna's speech and Eddy then says, "Yeah, Yeah, anyway the quicker we get lumpy out of there the quicker I avoid the "Skankers"!
Edna then makes a look at Eddy and says, "Don't forget Eddy... May saved your life! Now be nice..."
(Outside the Kanker's Trailer)
The four then see Marie hanging up clothes. Edna then says to Double D, Eddy, and Nazz, "I never told you guys this but I'm actually good at imitating voices so listen to this." Edna then tickles her throat and shouts in Lee Kanker's voice, "HEY MARIE, CHECK THIS OUT, THE NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOR IS TAKING OFF HIS SHIRT AGAIN!" Marie's visable eye become huge and she runs off while the other three laugh at this. Then Edna sees Lee making sandwiches and she shouts in Marie's voice, "HEY LEE! THE NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOR IS TAKING OFF HIS SHIRT AGAIN!" Then both of Lee's eyes become huge and visable and she runs out the door. Eddy then says, "Edna... that was pretty good!" Edna then says, "Yep, it takes lots of practice... that and May's sisters aren't that bright, now let's get Ed back!"
Edna and the three put on white sheets for disguise and went through the door to the trailer. They go up the stairs and Edna then says, "Stairs? Why does a trailer have a stairway? Oh well... back to rescuing Ed." They open the door and they see May and Ed watching "Round the Twist". The two see the four in white sheets and May screams, "AAAHHH! GHOSTS!" Edna takes off her sheet and she says, "It's us, we're here to rescue Ed!" May's eyes widen and she hugs Edna and says, "Oh I'm so glad to see you again!" Eddy then gags and says, "Yeah, Yeah, let's just grab Lumpy and go!" May then grabs Edna and says, "Wait! Take me with you! I don't think I should stay with those two anymore." Edna then says, "I kinda figured on that, now c'mon!"
As the four grab Ed and May, they bump into a rather angry Lee and Marie Kanker. Edna then shrugs and goes, "Umm... Oooooooh.... I am a ghost! BOOoooooo!" Lee and Marie then put yellow jawbreakers in their mouths and Nazz, Double D, Eddy, and Edna's sheets turn purple and they take them off. Lee then shouts, "IT'S YOU! THE CRAZY GIRL!" Marie then shouts, "SHE ALSO BROUGHT THE OTHER TWO WITH HER!"
The two approach them and as Lee says, "I am so going to enjoy this!" Edna then pulls out a stick with what appears to be "doodie" on it and she sticks it near their fear-stricken faces as she shouts, "DOODIE! DOODIE!" Marie then sniffs the "doodie" and she takes it off the stick and eats it. Marie then says, "HA! Nice try! It's a chocolate bar! Milky Way to be exact!"
Then while the two were distracted by the Milky Way bar, Eddy goes up to a record player, and puts on a record of the Benny Hill theme song on the player and then the fast motion chase starts.
(Benny Hill music plays)
They go to different rooms and Nazz then sees Lee with a chainsaw and runs really fast from her, Double D opens the shower curtain to hide but sees Marie bathing in there and runs off, Eddy tries to hide in a dresser but May was already in there so he screams and runs off, Ed starts running around with scissors and runs by Edna and Lee accidentally cuts off Edna's clothes revealing a swimsuit because Standards and Practices are on my butt at the moment. Edna gets so angry that she chases Lee with her club, but Lee retaliates with a weedwhacker, but Edna strikes back with shampoo on Lee's hair and giant scissors in her hand. Eddy grabs Edna's scissors and runs around even more till he bumped into the other two Kankers, cutting their clothes and showing off their swimsuits for censorship reasons. And then they go through and coming out of different doors in a hallway till May and the Eds bump into four teenagers and their Great Dane dog and ran back in the hallways. Nazz gets in the middle and for no reason her clothes strip off revealing her swimsuit and she pulls out a sign that reads "gosh-darn Benny Hill parody!" But then Everyone is in the middle of the room, there is a traffic light that makes the music stop that says "no chasing" and when it switched to "chasing" the music re-started and the chase began. The chase continued and Edna managed to fool the two sisters by painting a fake door that says "Eds are in here" so they ran into the fake door and fell to the floor.
(Benny Hill music ends)
Edna and the others then find a pink room and then they suddenly feel sleepy. Edna then says, "Oh no, something in this room smells like flowers, motor oil, and fish oil... run away... ruuun awaaa..."
(Five Minutes Later)
Edna wakes up and finds herself tied up. She also sees Nazz, Ed, Edd, n Eddy tied up as well. Then she turns and sees a sad looking May and a triumphant Lee and Marie with a pile of rotten vegetables. Lee then says, "So you're the nut who goes around and says you're a "Fourth Ed"... what's your name?" Edna then replies, "Edna! What are you meanie bo-beanies going to do to us?" Marie then says, "You're name is "Edna"? I guess you are a fourth Ed. Well while we make out with our "boyfriends" in front of you and that dumb blonde, we will be pelting you and her with our supply of rotten vegetables.
They get May, Marie hands her with a rotten tomato and Lee tells her, "Ok May, you get the honor of throwing a tomato at the one who made a monkey out of us! Now do it!" May is nervous and as if on purpose, she drops the tomato on Marie's pants and Marie is angered and tells May, "You pathetic waste of make up! You can't even do a simple thing, when we finish having our way with Edna we're gonna make you clean up the mess!"
Ed then says, "I'm thirsty!" Edna then smirks and has a Idea... She shouts, "HEY! RAMUNE!"
Before Lee and Marie can do anything, the wall suddenly bursts and a giant bottle of Ramune with arms, legs, and a face bursted through the wall yelling "OH YEAH! OH YEAH!" Ed then shouts "COOL! IT'S "THE RAMUNE MAN"! Then everyone got shocked. Lee is furious and tells the Ramune man, "You stupid jug of juice!You fix that wall right now! Mom will not believe that a giant bottle of Ramune bursted through the wall and I'm gonna get in trouble for it, don't touch me you drink!" Raumune Man then says "OH YEAH!" Marie then adds "OH NO! naughty naughty Ramune! that's also your problem your slogan, it should be "OH NO! what have I done to this trailer?"
So as Lee and Marie bet up the Ramune Man to fix the wall. May pulls out a knife and cuts the ropes that tied up Edna, Nazz, Ed, Edd, n Eddy and then they ran off and never looked back.
(Later that night at Edna's house)
May Kanker shows up in Edna's room in a new nightgown and says, "Wow, this looks nice, thanks Edna!" Edna then says, "You're welcome, thanks for helping us out! Those two are a bad influence and a hazard to your health May, stay with me!" May then agrees.
Ed, Double D, and Nazz are watching a episode of "Wacky Races" and Ed then asks, "What's wrong Eddy? Normally you get us to bet on the races and I end up betting on the "Dick Dastardly and Muttley in the Mean Machine 00!" Double D then tells Ed, "ED! Why would you bet on those cheating rouges? You know they never win a race!" Eddy then says, "It's nothing, just go watch the race." Then it turns out "the Gruesome twosome in the Creepy Coupe 02" won the race. Nazz then shouts, "HEY EDNA! YOUR CAR WON!" Edna then says, "Yippee! I guess that means Ed treats us to ice cream tomorrow!"
Eddy then feels something behind him and it was May Kanker hugging him. Eddy then says, "Ick! What's your problem?" May then says, "Nothing, I'm just hugging you because you're my friend." Eddy smiles slightly and then he brings up something, "Hey Edna, if "Curly" is living with you, isn't "Moe" and "Larry" going to try to get her back?"
Edna then says, "I hope not! Then again they only know where you three live, they have no idea where I live! And if they do I will not give up May, she deserves a new happier life and CHANGE in her life." Ed replies, "There's that word again! Just like that guy on TV who talks about change!" Edna then adds, "I'm going to protect her the same way I'd protect you three and Cousin Nazz.... hey why did you join the rescue mission?" Nazz replies, "Well it's because you're family and so are the Eds."
Edna then replies, "Not family... MY NAKAMA!" May Kanker then says, "Just what is a "Nakama" anyway?" Nazz replies, "Nakama is a Japanese term for comrades, friends, and people who are considered closer than family... It's a common term used in the anime "One Piece".. not that I even watch that show!.
May's eyes are huge and tear filled and she says, "You really think of me like that?" Edna nods and she ends up glomped my May. Eddy then says, "I also feel touched, you think of me as family Edna?" Edna then says, "Yup! But if you keep acting like a "meanie bo-beanie" then you will be a "black sheep"!"
Double D then asks Edna, "By the way Edna, how are you able to flawlessly imitate voices?" Edna replies, "Simple, lots of practice, I started out imitating Hanna Barbara Characters (Snagglepuss voice) I'd imitate Snagglepuss... and Muttley even!" (Laughs like Muttley)" May then says, "Amazing!" Ed then shouts, "DO EDDY!" Edna then says in her Eddy voice, "I'm Eddy, money money money!" Eddy then says in suprise, "I really sound like that?"
Edna then yawn and says, "Ok, last one! And we go to bed." Then Ed says, "AMERICA FERRERA!" Edna blushes and says, "Geez! I didn't even do any yet!" Ed then pokes at Edna's beautymark under her left eye." Edna then asks Ed, "What are you doing Ed?" Ed then says, "It's a chocolate chip for you are a sweet girl Edna!" Edna then blushes heavily and giggles and glomps Ed big time. Then May does to too and May smells Ed and says, "Hey Ed... where's your odor?" Ed replies, "Edna made me shower before my capture!" May stared at Edna and says, "You got "Big Ed" to shower?" Edna nods and says, "Sorry but most of my life, people teased me about my beautymark but when Ed said something nice about it...well... (blush) Umm I am aware of your crush on Ed and I'm worried you will pound me out of jealousy"
May then says, "No I won't, in fact I really want friends anyway, especially you (Ed) you (Edd) and especially you Eddy!" Eddy then says, "Enough "cutesy stuff" it's making me sick! I gotta scam in the morning, so goodnight!"
Nazz then turns off the light and then everyone falls asleep. Ed wakes up and he whispers, "Umm Edna... Thank you for saving me and I am glad you entered our life little chocolate chip!"
Edna then blushes heavily and just goes to sleep.
NEXT TIME: "Moe" and "Larry" do want their sister back and Edna comes up with a plan to see if they really do want her back! What is it? Find out next time!